Parenting is a process that lasts only for a short period. Therefore, anyone having parenting responsibility should be patient until the process is complete. Chinese and Western parenting techniques are similar as well as differ in some ways each one having its advantages and disadvantages. The paper will compare Chinese and Western parenting techniques and determine which one is the most superior.
Six years ago, a group of psychologists carried out research to investigate the degree of parenting control in the East Asian and the Western countries. The research involved 215 mothers and their children and showed high incidences of parenting control among the East Asian communities. Most of the Chinese parents used psychological control methods such as emotional and physical punishment to bring up children. According to the research, Chinese parenting is characterized by harshness, control, and strictness. The question is why most of Chinese and other East Asian parents are harsh and so much controlling. There are both psychological and cultural reasons behind this issue. In this aspect, there is a relation between academic performance and school life to their worth. Although results have been positive, it has been identified that such students learn under fear and much psychological torture. In addition, the need to uphold Chinese traditional culture of obedience is another reason behind Chinese strict parenting (Chua 24).
In her book, Chua presented some examples of psychological manipulation between her and her daughters (27). For instance, they engaged in many battles as Chua pushed them to perform better in playing violin, piano, and studying. She gave a minimum grade which each daughter had to achieve terming everything less than that unacceptable. She also restricted them from dates and sleepovers. This restriction brought rebellion among her daughters who refused to practice piano. She called them lazy, self-indulgent, pathetic, and coward.
The aspect of lying is also rampant among both the Chinese and western parents. The parents lied to their children with the aim of influencing their behavior. According to the research, Chinese parents lied and approved it more that the US parents. 98 percent of Chinese parents lied as compared to 84 percent of American parents. An example of such lies is "If you do not come with me, the hyena will come and eat you" (Chua 56).
Further research stated that too much control has adverse effects on children's life, lowers their self-esteem, afflicts them with depression, and retards their psychological development. Too much parental control explodes in children’s life through extreme ways such as matricide and suicide. The act has led to the demonstration of the youths for their liberty and freedom from excessive parental control. For instance, the group "Parents are Hazards" based in China has over 65000 members. Teenagers tell how their parents oppress and control their lives without considering personal interest and emotional well-being (Chua 71).
A recent study of the American ten-grade students carried out by a group of researchers found out that the East Asian community students did better than others in Science and Math. Yale law professor Amy Chua attributed this to the demanding and strict nature of the Asian parents. Though strictness bores fruits, it was also criticized as it brought emotional strain, low self-esteem, and poor performance among children (Chua 54).
On the other hand, Western parents are less persuasive, gentle and focus on talent rather than effort. They are, therefore, slow and less demanding to their children giving them a chance to pursue what they are interested in. This grants them freedom and high self-esteem. As a result, innovations and high performance among the teens increases. Apart from the benefits, a number of children have exploited this freedom and engaged in immoral activities such as drug abuse (Chua 19).
Therefore, based on the advantages and disadvantages of both parenting styles, it is advisable that these techniques are applicable but with limitations. A combination of both parenting techniques is the best. This is because parents will not have much control over their children making them responsible and thus enhancing their self-esteem. In addition, children will not have so much freedom to engage in unacceptable behaviors like drug abuse and sexual relations. However, each technique can be applied separately with limitations. For instance, in the Western parenting style, parents can regulate the extent of freedom given to children. Moreover, the Chinese parents can change the degree of control and regulations they give to their children.
In conclusion, it is evident that parenting and education are related and influence each other in different ways. Education equips students, who will become future parents with knowledge. Parenting, on the other hand, impacts skills of the students hence enabling them to appreciate and seriously engage in learning. Education is crucial and critical in many aspects. For instance, being well-educated, students can get employed in good and highly competitive organization. It also empowers people to advocate for their rights thus improving living standards. Despite these advantages, education has associated disadvantages. For example, it erodes culture in the sense that highly educated individuals do not find the need to be tied to cultural beliefs and traditions. This leads to one’s alienation hence poor relation with the community and family members who nurtured their growth.
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